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T O P I C    R E V I E W
denmark Posted - 12/31/2006 : 8:09:14 PM
I was agast when, on Christmas Eve, my visiting SIL told me she would like to have me knit her a scarf out of $1/skein yarn she had picked up at a craft store. Not that I like to think I'm a fiber snob, but I will admit that I like to knit w/natural fibers.

But get this:

Her reason for the bargain yarn was so that it wouldn't be a big deal when she lost the scarf on a bus, etc.! After I lifted my jaw off the floor, I explained that my knitting time was valuable, and the idea of spending time knitting something that was "cheap enough to lose" was not one I wanted to pursue. She was okay with that, but then said "I'll see if Mom will do it." Guess not, as I found the yarn sitting in my stash after everyone left.

I said to my DH, "would she ever ask an artist to draw a picture with cheap paints, with the idea she could go on the lose/destroy it?" Yikes!

Anyway, it turns out that her Christmas present (my DH bought) didn't work for her (no problem, it works for me :o) so you know what I felt I had to do...knit that dang scarf, yarn doubled, on #15 needles. Took about 3 hours, as I looked longingly at my socks WIP, with lovely #0 DPNs and STR yarn.

So yes, I did fold, but I think she will appreicate it now that she knows my initial feeling, and maybe, just maybe, the scarf will receive just a tad more care.

Beth
13   L A T E S T    R E P L I E S    (Newest First)
Francie Posted - 01/01/2007 : 9:05:01 PM
I, too, have a SIL who feels entitled to my talents. She has brought mending to me while visiting (5 hours away!). She is extremely specific about what colors should go into the hats she asks me to knit for her son every year. I only go along with that because he is my godson. She once asked me to finish a HUGE Dresden plate quilt began by her MIL. It was found in the MIL's things after her death. She said if I wouldn't do it then she would have to pay someone at her church to do it (horrors!).

Finally, SIL once asked if I had any counted cross-stitch samplers around the house that I wasn't using. Before I had three kids I had the time and peace of mind to do elaborate samplers in counted cross-stitch. When I told her I had none to spare but would be happy to make her a personalized one of her very own to be framed at her expense, she scoffed at the high price of framing. This was when DH and I were newlyweds and I was kind of afraid of SIL and all her nerviness. By now, I've disappointed her enough times that she has pretty much stopped trying to manipulate me. Phew.
gulf knitter Posted - 01/01/2007 : 8:32:53 PM
It is always nicest to knit for other knitters! Sarah.
PatriciaS Posted - 01/01/2007 : 2:34:11 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Chemcats

The nerve! What really got me was the way she slipped it into your stash!! OK, you caved, which is nice of you.



No it wasn't. It was caving and enabling of her.

Do you think said SIL will appreciate her work any more than before she said what she did? I don't, tho I'd be happy to be wrong.

The tipoff, IMO, was exactly what you noted: said SIL was so sure she could (once again) manipulate her sister-in-law into doing this despite having insulted her by saying to her face that her time has NO value to SIL that she just forged ahead. SIL wins AGAIN.

I see this kind of thing so much here -- are knitters particularly prone to just caving in such circumstances, or is it just my imagintion. WAKE UP, people. Stop being patsies and dupes! Value yourself and your time or no one else will.

-----------------------
dschmidt Posted - 01/01/2007 : 2:32:22 PM
quote:
Originally posted by procrastiknitter

On the plus side, you now know what to get her for Christmas every year for the rest of her life- a 3 hour $5 dollar scarf! Think of the time and money you will save.

The only bush I trust is my own.


[:00][:00][:00][:00][:00]

Donna in VA
procrastiknitter Posted - 01/01/2007 : 09:21:50 AM
On the plus side, you now know what to get her for Christmas every year for the rest of her life- a 3 hour $5 dollar scarf! Think of the time and money you will save.

The only bush I trust is my own.
denim Posted - 01/01/2007 : 07:10:03 AM
Ah, the lack of respect for handmade items. I enjoyed crocheting, actually, some beautiful snowflake-like woolen scarves for coworkers, this year. They were lightly felted and, to me, were really pretty.

So as a joke, the gals came down to my room to thank me, with the scarves draped over their head (like a caroler would wear it for a cap), and tied in an ugly knot under their chins. Made the scarves look ugly. [**]

But, as others have said, you have to really enjoy the making and the giving of the object. Who cares what happens when it gets into the receiver's hands, right?
Chemcats Posted - 01/01/2007 : 05:48:09 AM
The nerve! What really got me was the way she slipped it into your stash!! OK, you caved, which is nice of you. But I would have given her a pair of needles along with the scarf. And I would have told her, no more sneaking, no more scarves that are not valued, no more effort on you part that is not respected.

This is exactly why this year is the Year of Selfish Knitting at this house!!!

Meribeth
harakiri Posted - 01/01/2007 : 12:04:54 AM
I have that attitude. I enjoy the process, but know the person receiving it will probably lose it (preteen girls and acrylic scarves). I'm happy with what I make, I enjoyed making it and they loved getting them. What happens beyond that, really, I could care less.

~ Sarah

-------
Knitting since April 2006, excuse the mistakes, I'm a newbie.
SAHM to E- 2.5 & A- 20 months
www.eatmyoxygen.com
lucylocket Posted - 12/31/2006 : 11:27:00 PM
OMG - the hide of it (I have SILs but fortunately they are all 12,000 miles away from me in the UK !!!!!)Actually I do have one SIL here in Australia - my EX's sister - she is a very nice lady and a very talented craft person!!(name any craft and she's an expert at it !!)- the Name and Telephone No.tip sounds like a good idea!!Happy Knitting and Happy New Year - Lucylocket[meow]

My Pictures http://www.flickr.com/photos/lucicat/
v-allknit Posted - 12/31/2006 : 10:25:45 PM
i also face the same trouble, the yarn is cheap so no one thinks that time gone in to knit is more important. also the thought counts more than the gift..... knitted gift is more warmer :)

i have gifted knitted shawls to few friends, in Dewali.. Hindu's new year, few really loved it butfew never even called up to say thanks.
i dont let this bother me. next year i know who would like the knitted stuff, so i will make / knit for slected friends only.

shruti

My finished projects

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purlthis Posted - 12/31/2006 : 9:08:44 PM
Sew a tag into it with YOUR phone # and name, then you can just regift it to her over and over...lol...

Rachel
------------------------------------------------------
As I get older, I prefer to knit. Tracey Ullman
http://purledthis.blogspot.com/
denmark Posted - 12/31/2006 : 9:03:51 PM
Why didn't I think of that?

Actually, at the time, I did make a joke of somehow attaching it to her coat, the way kiddie mittens are strung together...it was all very good-natured and everyone had a good laugh!

Beth
stitchmd Posted - 12/31/2006 : 8:43:32 PM
Use Fair Isle or stitches to knit her name and phone number into it so it will be returned to her when she loses it.

You can't have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.

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