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 Is it OK to knit @ family functions?
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MindyO
Permanent Resident

USA
2493 Posts

Posted - 11/08/2007 :  01:53:37 AM  Show Profile Send MindyO a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I knit and crochet. My family is very crafty and it's almost expected that someone will whip out some sort of project, but my problem lies with my in-laws.

My sis-in-law dabbles with crochet, but never brings it with her. No one else on his side of the family really does any knitting or crochet anymore. When we get together for holidays, b-days etc. I often bring a small project, but then get embarrassed to bring it out. I'm not sure if it bothers anyone, or possibly offends them. Maybe this is just rude behavior? I also feel a little self concious because they stare at me, which makes me feel like I'm doing something wrong. Some people ask questions, which leads me to give lengthy, detailed (possibly unwanted) answers. I like to talk, a lot.

Weekends are really my best knitting time, and if I'm there it's taking away from my knitting. As a slow knitter I need all the time I can get. But at the same time I just feel as if I'm doing something wrong, or being rude even though I still participate in conversations. I can knit AND talk! It's a miracle, really... The only time I feel as if it's okay is if I'm trying desperately to finish an object for one of the kids to take home that day.

Am I just absolutley paranoid? Or is it really rude to knit at family gatherings with non knitters?

mertle
Permanent Resident

USA
1734 Posts

Posted - 11/08/2007 :  03:05:19 AM  Show Profile Send mertle a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Mindy, I say Go for it! They should get the picture pretty quickly that you can participate and knit/crochet at the same time. Consider a project that's simple & smallish, and keep your answers as succinct as you can. (I, too, love to run my mouth - especially about knitting!)

My knitting goes everywhere with me - parents' house, in-laws' house, sister's deck, most restaurants, doctors' offices, emergency rooms, mechanic's, movies, & even church. If I didn't bring it out, my friends and family would wonder what was wrong! I don't bring it out at most concerts or the opera, funerals or weddings.

If I worried about knitting around non-knitters, I'm afraid I wouldn't knit much! Good luck!

Marilyn
Check out my bags here.
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lucylocket
Permanent Resident

4172 Posts

Posted - 11/08/2007 :  03:10:28 AM  Show Profile Send lucylocket a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Hey Mindy - I wouldn't worry about it - I knit when and where I please - I don't go out a lot anyway and most of my relatives are in the UK except for my 3 grown up kids, granddaughter and my son-in-law. I knit on trains, buses, railway stations and bus stops. If anyone stares I don't notice - I usually have my iPod plugged into my ears - music and knitting go together like peaches and cream!! I seem to do most of my talking on the internet[:00]Happy Knitting!

Lucy [IMG]http://i133.photobucket.com/albums/q61/loliwoli/catyawn.gif[/IMG]My Blog - Lucy Knits
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scraffan
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1844 Posts

Posted - 11/08/2007 :  03:33:18 AM  Show Profile Send scraffan a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I agree with booth Mertle and Lucy.
Keep the project simple so you can talk.
At most family gatherings people just sit and talk anyways so why not sit, talk and use knitting needles too?
Karen
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KL
Permanent Resident

6041 Posts

Posted - 11/08/2007 :  04:37:09 AM  Show Profile Send KL a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I don't leave the house without it-ever.

If I haul it out in front of a new group of people; I kinda slide into it. Meaning, I make sure that I'm focused on the conversation, comment, lots of eyecontact- then quietly pick up the needless; and continue the conversation.

Seems to work well.

I think some would percieve it as rude if one just sat and knit and didn't contribute or show any interest in what is going on around them.. tuned everyone out.

I would think with family, they would finally get used to it, so don't worry. Knitting is a big part of who you are.

Keep it up. KL
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Wen
Permanent Resident

Australia
3244 Posts

Posted - 11/08/2007 :  04:52:31 AM  Show Profile  Visit Wen's Homepage Send Wen a Private Message  Reply with Quote
If you are just visiting, why not? I knit while I chat all over the place.

I wouldn't try it in the middle of dinner or during a speech from the Father of the Bride, but during a pleasant afternoon in comfy chairs or by the pool go for it.

Wen

2007 stats: 5 FO, too many WIP, 1 frogpond.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/wen1965/
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Rho
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1570 Posts

Posted - 11/08/2007 :  04:53:46 AM  Show Profile  Visit Rho's Homepage Send Rho a Private Message  Reply with Quote
The only reason I don't bring it to all functions is that there is a two year old and I don't want to worry about him pulling it out of my hands or jumping on my lap and getting stuck.... But if they aren't going to be there it is with me - heck it is the only way I can put up with some of my in-laws without contemplating homicide. And as soon as the little guy is a bit older it will be with me all the time....

Let me change that a bit - I still have it with me so if he falls asleep I can pull it out....I just don't knit when he is up and running

rho

If at first you DO succeed -- try something harder

http://thisandthat-rho.blogspot.com/
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jeanhal
Warming Up

51 Posts

Posted - 11/08/2007 :  04:58:54 AM  Show Profile Send jeanhal a Private Message  Reply with Quote
My take is - if when I go visiting people can leave the TV on, I can knit. Not to say I only knit when people leave the TV on, but, as said above, I can carry on a conversation while knitting, so what's the affront? If we are looking at old photos, or playing a game, of course not. As to answering the knitting questions - trust me, people get more of an earful when they ask me beekeeping questions - and my sister rolls her eyes as she's heard it all before. And she just keeps knitting :)
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MelissaKnits
New Pal

USA
15 Posts

Posted - 11/08/2007 :  05:25:43 AM  Show Profile  Visit MelissaKnits's Homepage Send MelissaKnits a Private Message  Reply with Quote
When I was a child, my great aunts and grandmothers all knit at the holidays, always. It is one of my warmest and fondest memories - all the aunts seated around the table after dinner knitting and chatting and sipping coffee and tea. I always have knitting with me just about everywhere I go, including family parties.
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gwtreece
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USA
7254 Posts

Posted - 11/08/2007 :  05:43:16 AM  Show Profile  Send gwtreece a Yahoo! Message Send gwtreece a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Go for it. You could always ask husband what he thinks his family would say about it. My inlaws are used to me knitting. I can hold a conversation better when I'm knitting. I can also sit. If I'm not knitting then I have a hard time sitting down.

Wanda
My Blog
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momslake
Gabber Extraordinaire

USA
559 Posts

Posted - 11/08/2007 :  06:23:54 AM  Show Profile Send momslake a Private Message  Reply with Quote
If other visitors can watch football (or some other sport), you can knit. I always knit at family functions. However, like everyone else, I do recommend keeping it simple so you can participate in the conversation.

"In the northern wilderness, where wool is a way of life."
My Photos (not all knitting) http://www.flickr.com/photos/9944308@N08/
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Mocha
Permanent Resident

Singapore
2903 Posts

Posted - 11/08/2007 :  07:09:14 AM  Show Profile Send Mocha a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I'd say depends on situation. You can attempt and see what's the feedback like. I knitted discreetly during one of the dinner recently. I still don't have the nerve to knit in front of my parents-in-laws -yet. hehe...

If they are very critical of you knitting, then perhaps it will be better not to knit. But if you cannot resist, go ahead but inform your husband to do the job of protecting you if someone complains.
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Atavistic
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6604 Posts

Posted - 11/08/2007 :  07:37:14 AM  Show Profile  Visit Atavistic's Homepage Send Atavistic a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Why not ask your husband? He'll know much better than any of us how his family would react...

Amanda Takes Off... and Amanda Knits

Hand and foot when harmonized forms martialism/but Military and literary when harmonized is art and this brings/philosophy. (Lee, Chang Hoo)
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HomekeepingGran
Seriously Hooked

614 Posts

Posted - 11/08/2007 :  08:00:05 AM  Show Profile Send HomekeepingGran a Private Message  Reply with Quote
A couple of years ago I began taking my crochet or knitting around with me many places, including to someone's house for after dinner. It always seems I get stuck in a room with a lot of gossiping women (although my husband says HE gets stuck in a room with a lot of gossiping men!) and want something to take the edge off for me. My hands itch to do something if I don't happen to have it.

As far as being rude goes, I agree that if you participate in the conversation and don't become so absorbed in your knitting that you hardly lift your head, you can certainly take it with you. It's time handcrafters restore their gentle arts to the public forum.

Blessings,
Carla

She seeketh wool and flax and worketh willingly with her hands... Proverbs 31:13
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Chayah
Permanent Resident

1926 Posts

Posted - 11/08/2007 :  08:34:24 AM  Show Profile Send Chayah a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Last summer I had a bad experience with a friend who got furious at me for crocheting while we were talking. She felt I was not paying attention and that I could crochet any time. Because of this I usually ask if anyone minds if I knit or crochet, and very few people object. It makes me feel better to check, after that upsetting experience. I also carry my knitting with me almost all the time. Happy knit/crochet....Chayah in NY

"When I was young I admired clever people. Now that I'm old I admire kind people."(A.J.Heschel)
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MindyO
Permanent Resident

USA
2493 Posts

Posted - 11/08/2007 :  10:24:45 AM  Show Profile Send MindyO a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Atavistic

Why not ask your husband? He'll know much better than any of us how his family would react...


To put it plain and simply, he's an idiot (highly intelligent, but socially stupid) and would prefer I not knit anywhere since it seems to disrupt his life or something.

Thank you all for all of your feedback, I think I am just being paranoid. No one has ever made any comments, and usually the questions are how do you do that, what type of yarn is that, etc. I should have specified that even though all of my projects are still relatively simple, I do have to look at what I'm knitting while knitting it. I can glance away for a few seconds at a time, but I'm not that skilled yet to not look. And of course never during dinner!
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fiddlerbird555
Permanent Resident

USA
1429 Posts

Posted - 11/08/2007 :  10:47:40 AM  Show Profile Send fiddlerbird555 a Private Message  Reply with Quote
As far as at what length to answer questions, then you need to pay attention whether it's a polite comment or a real question, and tailor your answer to that, as well as a guess at the knowlege base of the person who is asking. (Don't get too technical if they can't tell a knit from a purl).

____________________________________________________

I can go loopy, or I can knit. Your choice.
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mokey
Permanent Resident

15375 Posts

Posted - 11/08/2007 :  11:09:20 AM  Show Profile Send mokey a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Someone once asked why I "had to do that" so I replied it kept my fingers out of my nose. That shut them up and I was able to keep on knitting, never asked me again!



Brought to you by the tongue in cheek-y monkey
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Help me walk all over cancer again in 2008
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Milinda
Permanent Resident

USA
3817 Posts

Posted - 11/08/2007 :  12:24:54 PM  Show Profile Send Milinda a Private Message  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by mokey

Someone once asked why I "had to do that" so I replied it kept my fingers out of my nose. That shut them up and I was able to keep on knitting, never asked me again!



Brought to you by the tongue in cheek-y monkey
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Help me walk all over cancer again in 2008




::[:00][:00][:00][:00][:00][:00][:00][:00]

OMG, Mokey, that is hilarious!

M L
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fiddlerbird555
Permanent Resident

USA
1429 Posts

Posted - 11/08/2007 :  12:32:04 PM  Show Profile Send fiddlerbird555 a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Actually, at one point, my ex-SIL took up crocheting to stop biting her nails. I still have the afghan, and it's very nice.

____________________________________________________

I can go loopy, or I can knit. Your choice.
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Bethany
Permanent Resident

USA
1546 Posts

Posted - 11/08/2007 :  12:39:02 PM  Show Profile Send Bethany a Private Message  Reply with Quote
It's a family gathering. If you can't knit around your family, where can you knit (except locked away in a closet somewhere?)

This makes me regret that things didn't work out with my boyfriend in grad school, at whose family gatherings someone usually broke out the power tools sooner or later...
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